My Life

 I sat wondering if my life is normal. 

I mean not many people can write and sustain a blog about their comical and awkward life.

Everything I write is a true and an actual event, 

and to be honest I've wondered if maybe my wild life is a little too crazy !!

Most people don't hijack a classroom with all their classmates and have a rave in our tap shoes, and playing 007 on your street trying to avoid the Jehovah's witness' is not really 

a common occurrence to most people either.

I often find myself in the most random situations thinking some utter nonsense, 

that actually leaves me wondering if I'm the only one who thinks these kind of things ...

Like ..

Do the people who put Aglets (the plastic tip) on shoelaces have to have detailed training,

or have a degree in order to be responsible for one of the most important parts of a shoe ?

..

Is it completely normal that I know how to gut a fish and complete a full makeover with a simple hairgrip ?

..

 JayZ must see Beyonce without her wigs and with no bra on ?!

..

Why do the idiots in every supermarket ask me if I would like a bag .... 

when I obviously have a trolley full of shopping and I obviously didn't bring my own bags..

Or they'll hand you 2 bags for everything, then casually ask if you need more..

'No course not, I'll just carry the rest on my head'

..

Am I the only one who takes great joy in hovering up large items such as socks and hairbands ?

I've heard its been called the 

''Hover Challenge''

and we all must do it at some point, 

yanno when you cannot be bothered to pick up the stuff on the floor,

so you stand and think how to get rid of the 'sock' without actually moving it..

I find myself staring at it for a good minute or so...

waiting, 

contemplating,

then ...

I make sure my mums not in the room 

(because she wouldn't be to happy to know how much of a rebel her daughter is)

then ''Vooooooshhh'' and the sock disappears. 

....

I've learnt to deal with the fact that I'm not normal, 

but I would hate to be normal if that means that I'm not me.

If I wasn't me, I'd still wanna be me .. ahem..

Ignore me. 

Still Aspiring

Did everyone leave the building then Yh ?

Never before have I had to deal with
the ninny, contradictory, foot sweats, that are teachers.
My teachers have always been my mumsie and daddums.
Don't get me wrong,
I do have some wonderful understanding teachers
whom are caring and
blah de blah sopp sopp goey gush.
*Ahem*
But today the horrible kind of teacher,
drew a line in front of her stubby little legs, and well and truly crossed it.

The fire alarm goes off and she leaves the whole class and legs it off
as if she isn't responsible for us all.
She ran out of the class like a fat kid chasing a Big Mac.


THE CHEEK
My mother doesn't pay £5000 tuition for the teacher
to leave me to burn in a building.
Then when she decided to come and find us outside,
she had the cheek to ask 'if everyone left the building',
with a smile on her face ?
My reply was
.......
''I dunno''
*insert vexation*
''There might still be someone in there.''
*insert fake smile*
........

I mean teachers are so contradictory sometimes !!
They expect you to know what they want you to do ...
even before they tell you.
You just wanna ask
'Do I look like I'm off Heroes ?? am I supposed to read your mind?'

. All I'm saying is .
..
My mother does not mess with her child's education.
Lets not be silly now...
If she didn't care how I was treated by other teachers
then she wouldn't have educated me for 15 years.

Still Aspiring